Ohio Countdown 2004

2004 Presidential battleground analyzed by a grizzled campaign veteran and Ohio's Top Targeted Undecided Perfectly Predictive Swing Voter - His Mom.


My Mom and Bill Clinton

In the biggest "...yeah, so anyway" of all time, the media follows up a bipartisan week of Reagan worship and the nauseating sight of George W. Bush drooling all over the Clintons at their White House portrait unveiling, with a return to the good old days of discussing where Bill Clinton's Penis may or may not have been.

How does this matter to Ohio in 2004? I asked my mom, who as everyone knows is the Ohio swing voter, what she thought of the 60 Minutes Bill Clinton interview. It was like entering a time warp back to 1998.

She said, "What do I care?" End of conversation.

Which of course is why Bill Clinton survived. Real people never cared where Bill Clinton's Penis may have been. Only Ken Starr and his disciples cared where Bill Clinton's Penis may have been.

On November 2, George W. Bush will find out precisely what real people care about.


At 11:05 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Monica Lewinski cared!
Over here is the sunny Septred Isle set in a silver sea, Monica L managed to pip Ginger Spice (Geri Halliwell) to the number one spot of the 'Top 100 Borderline boilers'.
This is the competion that ranks ladies in the public eye whom you wouldn't generally consider as a legitimate sexual partner on account of some physical or psychological flaw, however as long as you mates don't find out, its OK.
Geri: big mouth and ginger, but has enough money to get you a cab home.
Monica Lewinsky: a bit fat, but she swallows (most of the time).

English Joke circa 1998:

Monica Lewinsky walks into a dry cleaners with a dress with a stain down the front.
She approaches the man at the counter and says:
"Can you remove this stain please?"
The man, who is partially deaf cups his hand round his ear and says:
"Come again?"
To which Monica says:
"No, gravy actually".

Rule Britannia!

Lord S


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